Learning to Forgive

I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men. [D&C 64:9–10]

I would be lying if I said that anger was not a real part of the grieving process.  Sometimes I am angry at individuals...those closest to me…sometimes myself…sometimes people I don’t even really know.  Sometimes I feel abandoned, misled, or confused.  It’s difficult not to question an emulated lifestyle .  Some days, I feel so alone.  

I choose to forgive.

“It’s all part of the process,” people say.  “It’s totally normal,” which I suppose means I’m validated in my feelings...but how would they know?  No two trials are ever the same.  It’s easy to offer comfort when you’re secretly grateful it’s not you.  However, as a good friend explained to me, I have come to realize that 'grief, sorrow, and pain are universal...enabling us to relate with compassion and love toward those we see suffering.’  

I choose to forgive.

Insensitive remarks can cause so much hurt to the broken-hearted.  I wonder if that’s why some people choose to remain silent in the face of another’s adversity.  “How can they not say something about this?” I ask.  I know we’re all at different points in our progression, and most of us are fighting our own demons anyway.   

I choose to forgive.  

How can I rise above an outcome that cannot be changed?  How can I ever feel the peace I once knew?  I have never known such pain, and I know there will be many days ahead when my heart aches and my tears flow.  

Even then, I will choose to forgive.  

I know forgiveness is not a one-time choice.  I have to choose it every day, over and over again.  Often many times in one day - when I see the grief felt by my mom, my brothers, and their wives, when my own children ask questions that cannot be answered right now, when I look at pictures of happier times or see his pencil markings in all of my music books.

I choose to forgive.

Why?  Because I trust in Him, for “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me” (Philippians 4:13), and come what may, there is true joy in the promises of eternity.  

 

Soccer Daddy

There’s something to be said about this man who works long hours providing for our family, yet still finds time to coach the cutest soccer team in town. :)  I’ve always known Jared was a good dad, but it’s pretty amazing to see him make a difference in the lives of other kids, too.  

His tech skills come in handy, too!  He has an app on his phone that keeps track of each player and their positions…while recording individual on-the-field playing time.  So funny.  I tease him a little, but he takes it seriously, and the girls love it!   

GO…"Sparklers!"

Grateful in All Things

Today I am feeling grateful for so many things in my life.  

This morning it was my daughters and the love they have for each other.  Every October, spirit week ends with the annual Jog-a-Thon.  Students receive donations based on the number of laps they can run in one hour.  Carlie’s goal was to run 15 laps.  AnnMarie’s goal was to make sure Carlie achieved her goal. :)  It was amazing to see AM set a pace that pushed C to the end.  These two are runners!!  They both accomplished their goals, and it was inspiring to myself (and others) to see AM’s dedication to her little sis.  

Later today my gratitude came from this picture of my big brother and his family.  Man, I’m grateful for the way they make me laugh.  The 80s stack:    

I found myself touching my washer and dryer for a few seconds today.  My heart overflowed with gratitude over the simple fact that it was dependable…working…and washing/drying so many clothes all at once.  I had a quick flashback to my days in Argentina when line drying was all I had.  I have so much to be grateful for right now in my life.  

Happy Conference Weekend!!